No. Seriously.

No matter what crap I spew about Phonathon, it does, on occasion, bring forth interesting conversations from extraordinary individuals. It might be the Theatre major who is now a neurologist or one of the first female lawyers in Illinois, but whoever it is, you end up hanging on his or her every word. (I mean, come on. Both Frank Galati and Michael Greif are in the calling pools. Thankfully neither picked up or I would have word vomited, but still. Pretty awesome.)

So at Phonathon today I was doing my typical "Hi, I'm from Northwestern, let's check your contact info, let's check where you work, let's have some pointless conversation, give me your money" gab when I start talking to this man (Craig Erwich) who is the Executive VP of Warner Horizon, which produces The Bachelor. This is a totally notable guy and I'm very much enjoying talking to him about producing hit TV shows.

But, as every Phonathon conversation goes, you run dry and reach desperately for new topics. The old standby? "So, how did you get from Northwestern to your current job?"

Mr. Erwich paused for a second before making an admission: "I used to work as EVP of Programming at FOX. And then I got fired."

Me, stunned: "Like, FOX, FOX? Like you arranged all the programming at FOX?"

Erwich: "Yeah. Do you watch FOX?"

Well then, I confessed my Two-Season FOX Rule: The show must be on for at least two seasons (or, at least one season and renewed for a second) on FOX before I get attached. This is to make sure I don't get hurt in the end like I did with Firefly, John Doe, and Reunion.

Erwich: "That's pretty smart. FOX is swift to cancel things. Did you have a favorite show?"

Me, reminiscent: "Remember that Friday night line-up? Firefly followed by John Doe? When they were both canceled within a season, it pretty much broke my heart."

Firefly was the first show that FOX used to shoot
my poor little heart to pieces.

Erwich, laughing a bit: "Yeah, that was me."

Me, stunned again: "You--You canceled them?"

Erwich: "Well, no one was watching them."

Me, squealing: "I was watching them!"

While this was happening, Jeff and Mitch surrounded me, wondering what the heck was happening while I mouthed "He canceled Firefly!" as clearly as possible. Jeff was taken aback and perched next to me, listening intently before he pressed the "Pledge" button--because, clearly, this guy has cash.

Me, continuing: "And then they made Serenity!"

Erwich, good-natured: "And no one saw that, either."

Me, even higher pitched: "I saw it!"

And then, after I got over my brief squeaky outrage, we talked shop about House and Bones briefly before he pledge-carded me.

But seriously. Best. Phonathon. Convo. EVER. It makes me really excited about being a Northwestern alum, considering we have so much power/so many resources. I could cancel people's favorite shows!

Ri-dick.

P.S. He totally got a 24 character named after him. Okay, the guy got killed but you know what? Getting a character named after you? BADASS.